A can of worms

It’s hard to know what’s more depressing about the Heinz ad gay kiss fracas: the fact that people actually felt strongly enough to complain, or the fact that the ad was taken off the air by Heinz. We’re talking about the least sexy man-on-man kiss in the history of television. Anyone who found this offensive is an obvious lunatic.

But, digging deeper, there’s a curried bean in this somewhere that burns my ass.

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Flexi-time

That was a nice message. I could reply to it right away. So, I’ll reply … mm … later. First, I’ll have a cup of tea and read that article that caught my eye on my RSS feed.

While I wait for the kettle to boil, perhaps I could put some washing in the machine. No, by the time I’ve sorted out my colours, the water won’t be BOILING hot anymore and I’ll have to boil it all over again. Forget that. I could … I need a pee, I’ll pee.

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Pigeon Shit

Ding dong, darlings.

You may, if you’ve been rigorous in your consumption of online current affairs (i.e. following FaceFuck updates), already be aware – so apologies for repetition – that a pigeon shat on my head outside Starbucks on Friday 13th. Apparently, this was “lucky”.

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YOU’RE A C*NT! / Not my words: a man in the crowd

If you’ve ever boarded an N8 towards Hainault at 3am in full drag you might be familiar with the descent of a dreaded sense that there’s a man near you who seems suddenly possessed of the urge to defend himself against your fabulousness. There may even be more than one. And all you want to do is get home.

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The cut and thrust

Sleep, or rather the lack of it, continues to be the principle threat to my sanity.

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Tom Jones

A man so hairy he has to wax his own tongue.

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